Les efforts Lonely d'une montagne

être courageux, c'est ainsi que le temps passe vite ... bientôt vous vous retrouverez ne me manques pas du tout, et je vais être triste, mais heureux parce que tu es toujours vivant ... ma chérie, je sais que ce n'est pas le façon dont vous avez toujours rêvé de me dire, mais laissez-la sortir, dans l'air froid des montagnes ... Je t'aime trop.

The efforts of a Lonely Mountain
be brave, that's how time flies ... Soon you will find I is not missing at all, and I'll be sad, but happy because you're still alive ... my dear, I know this is not the way you've always dreamed of telling me, but let it out in the cold mountain air ... I love you too.

Dangers of A Juvenile Inefficiency

Sadly i haven't had enough time to keep posting blogs, and now i feel as if my head is going to implode from just the sheer amount of frustation coursing through my veins. I feel as if my schoolwork isn't that important now, and am becoming bored by staying here. I am becoming restless...i cannot stand this form of torture...over-sadism i do not mind, romance i love, drama i regale, and immaturity i abhorr....what is my problem?

Today....

Avec des nuits blanches...

With sleepless nights ...

Gémissements

Je n'aime pas que d'être aimé, mais pour être dit que je suis aimé.
 Ecoute ...

Whining
I do not like to be loved, but to be told I am loved.
Listen...
 

La Quête de l'insomnie...

Pourquoi suis-je ici?,

 Quest for Insomnia...
Why am I here? 

Starting From The First Light Of My Window

I woke up(: Turned on my aging/dying desktop(: and I checked my email, haha i had a reply from an awesome friend from Fanfiction.net (i highly recommend it) Kandakicksass is the best of my far away friends haha, so i snapped up a long and quirky and witty reply haha (my specialty i presume is making people laugh) (it's a nice feeling knowing somebody smiled because of me :)) (yes, i'm a huge softy who has fluffy images of love and sweetness in her head) (sorry but that's about 10% of my dreams) after that i clicked on a link when to FF.net and started reading a few more Vampire Knight fanfic's, all about KanameXZero yaoi smexy goodness (yeah i'm also a perv. heh i'm a mass of contradictions i swear.) I just sat down and watched the last few minutes of Eragon, and then i watched an hour of Julie & Julia, then finished with and hour and a half of Air Buddies so yeah pretty uneventful although of course i cried when Brom died, and when Sapphyra appeared dead (yeah i'm pretty emotional, sue me k? :)) I took out the laundry mom left for me to take out, played a bit with my fat, spoiled cat Miguel (he's gray, looks like he wears eyeliner and is the poofier, smaller version of his (dead) mommy Artemis, and there's not a trace of his (dead) daddy in him (who was a fat orange tabby named Apollo, see the trend? :)) and right now as i type, Miguel is curled in my lap, purring his little heart away, and i'm listening to "The Airway" since Owl City is my favorite and all of a city i'm thinking about Harry Potter. hmm. awkward haha.  I saw a pretty Charcoal Grey Halter Dress by Flirt 4372 and i wished with all my heart i had that model's body, but beauty isn't everything, and i know her life isn't perfect but in that photo she could probably fool even herself. So then i started looking up corsets and decided on an overbust one, but they're uber expensive and i can't afford one at this time so i'm also cursing my lack of money, (i can imagine your response...Get A Job) (too bad haha...i'm 14) and wow am i mad, but i found a bunch of beautiful corsets that i love, but can't afford so i have a love/hate relationship with the internet and the economy and grr i want to hit something xD. So now it's "Saltwater Room" and i'm surprised at how long i've been typing since i'm already on  Ocean Eyes, and now i'm up to my neck in self-doubt and confidence oddly enough, and i have this odd sensation in my heart, i feel like wrapping myself in a snug sweater and losing myself in it, and just trusting its softness to keep me happy and safe so now i guess i'm coming off as lonely and pathetic and yeah i guess you could say that. I mean, i have friends, and i guess i'm glad they're just friends, i have some best friends that i don't really know anything about, i have a crush on a guy i love to hate, i find myself becoming conceited despite the fact that i have little self worth or even self understanding. i have a good amount of self respect and although i have no idea who i am and am perpetually confused about who i'm supposed to be or whatever the latest novel is telling me, i'm just going to shut up right now, end this post, go take a long hot shower and will myself to accept me for who i am. So that's exactly what i'll do. I would love to be a beauty, but for now, i'm content to be jolie laide and to be truthful...i'm north of beautiful.

January 23rd, two-thousand-and-eleven

Sadly, it seems as if my normal past time includes watching Romantic comedies and listening to Owl City, and even crying when Aerosmith's "Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" comes up. I can imagine your response, "Just delete the effing song from your WMP Library, that way, even on shuffle you won't hear it..." sad to say, i'm severely messed up, haha look at me here jumping around, from subject to subject (even if it was only a few) i could safely say that you have no idea who the hell i am, why i cry to IDWMAT, or even why i started this blog, (but we all have our reason's haha) yet, in a movie, (1) this would be the part where the sad, or uninspired social bleh is typing about her (or his) unfortunate luck, and the lack of the world's interest in their talents and possiblities in making the world a better place. We all know of course, that by the end of the movie she'll snag the Mr. Right, get the perfect job, hell, she'll even get a makeover and tell her old boss she desnt hate him (or her), but only Gosh knows how much he helped her by putting her down...same old same old. That's what really gets me frustrated, i for one love surprises, twists, and the other icings on the cake, haha, speaking of cake i love that Red Velvet stuff haha YUM! back on topic, whatever it was..."The Tip Of The Iceberg", and et cetera, haha, you'll see where i marked the (1), yeah i suddenly remembered where i was going, okay i lost it again, ok i'm back haha, alright, they start off with this killer line/innuendo that hooks you onto it and you can't stop watching it, (don't lie, the proof is all there. example: Catwoman. "This is the day i died.", are you really going to tell me you didn't watch that sucker beginning to end, and cheer on Halle Berry as she kicked major butt, snagged the hot cop, let him go (WTF!) and killed that she-witch? exactly my point) gosh it's my first time blogging so i'll just start with today okay? wonderful.