Thursday, June 23, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
I don't remember,,,
Cold and terrifying is what you are, Alone exemplifying is what you seem, Taciturn crying, is what you hear, doubtful fighting, is what you do, ...
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
You & You & You...Mona Lisa.
Mona Lisa...give me a smile, and I'll frown upon you, leave me alone, just run home, where the gin is waiting for your shaking fingers, the cool bottle consoles your aching hungers, thirsty for more than revenge and unknown to us all, you'd transform into the one thing you'd hate to love....most importantly you'll confuse and astound with your womanly wiles, and escape and enthrall with passions futile pains, and arouse the chorus with a simple pose, of posture.
I'll fall to your feet, and wash them with my faked tears, you'll frown and entreat me, to a painful kick here, my heart in your hand, how fast did time pass? I am not a man, who believes in lies, more so I lie to you… I could've sworn, amidst all the wars, your long flowy hair, shaded black in despair, fulfilled the prophecy, of a woman too young to see, the ways of the world, from the viewpoint of a five year old.
Lisa, give me a hand, I'll keep you safe, if i were lying, we'd be amazed, the sinners church, is more extravagant than a prince's birth, and lying here, underneath the stars, i take your neck in my mouth, and compare our scars, with water filled lullabies, tearing us apart, no use for grammar or even simple need, all along, enthroned in alabaster, you were the queen.
Taken to poetry, the musical has been cancelled, the orchestra fired, the chandelier dismantled, an aura of kindle, a fire, a maze, in short simple terms, a contradictory gaze, astounded by diamonds, ambushed by coal, i stare, unabashedly, at your red ripped royal soul, kept in a jar, a jar filled with emotions, unused by all, all left unspoken.
Mona, i take your hand, is this your last request? Doomed to a life, filled with surgery and regret, chained to a wall, with a last hope to perfect, a blank diary, greets my visage, bandaged and broken, unknown to us all, i use this last resort, as a measure of trust, we walk the line, between roses and musk, there is no reason, i fall down this life, knowing very well what compromise would ensue, i crawl, blind towards the light...
Mona Lisa, take this last impressive bow, the tragedy of romantic comedy, gone forever, the vile summary is missing vitality, the facts have all been sugar-coated, advertising companies swoop in with powder, and sable coats.
So unsure of yourself, your hair flows into the lakebed, strutted down your last runaway line, gutted with gusto and disgust evident in your noble eyes, take back the fast pace, give her back her lovely old face, i couldn't protect you, my iconic grief coincides with the sayings of a wise one, the sun is burning me, alone in a dead sky, broken like your latest jewelry design, my mind reeling, i stumble, the storms winds' have pushed me into a better thinking position. There is no comfort believing in you, my little one, my toy you've grown up, you can't keep living in this coal mine, keep running till you fit the princess's stereotype, and then dig in the dirt, for your last ruby ring, do not go gently into that spark of last light, let the foolish side take over your reasonable mind, let practicality take over your dormant frugality, buy the sun, buy everything until you're broke from the inside out.
Lisa, you're pretty little head astounds me, even to this day...your sweetness makes my temperament look appalling, I resent you. Never grow up is what she told you, oh she lied, isn’t life so much sweeter when you know you’re about to die?
The telephone rings, and Leonardo ignores it so he can paint your brow, how lovely, it’s real. Unlike the others of your time, you have lines, lines, lines, everywhere, my line has disappeared, in this fast paced job, how can you overlook a weekend off? Too much, too much, I overdose on your private thoughts, the taste of your skin strikes a dull chord in me, awakening the memory of writing, sickened I lean forward, anticipating that metallic glint off of my tongue, whenever your blood meets mine,…oh, I wish we could do this all day, but night is approaching, and my social calendar is full, this voice I hear, this voice within, clouds my judgment, and I decide to spend the night.
Little known to me, your energy, envenomates me, and I look inside myself and trust your strength, emotionless you frown at my hesitation. Right and wrong has never been so difficult for you…you just frowned that beautiful smile, and people threw themselves at your feet, and you kicked them faraway…too afraid of connecting with them, holding onto the shreds of sanity that lead to the door of your self, no one else could compare to the madness, the deadliness made it so addicting, and here we are again, falling down this path of unmistaken misery, a journey that stabs us with confidence, and we’re learning now, how to trust yourself, and even if I have to kill you, you’ll understand, nothing else is a map, save your blood, begin to hate me, I resist your temptations, your charms…my self I’m a fool, a fool, dastardly thinking, it fooled me, me, me, oh I’m immune to your body, your voice, but those eyes alas those eyes.
Your frown makes it so much tastier, to devour you, oh enslaved I’m addicted, accomplished, sophisticated past the point of harder, better, faster, stronger, twice as amazingly powerless to your beating, deceiving, heart…your décolletage, so soft, it calls to me.
I must whisper all of my greatest everythings, all my naughty little somethings, all my tempted bastard lovings, possessed, enthralled, beaten to submission, poisonous, nothings, group together, form an army, and hate you, you, you, you, with all of our hearts…
Oh, Mona Lisa, every part of you & you & you, loosens my values till I’m insane enough to anticipate killing you,…
Oh my lovely, dangerous, complicated, oh so amazingly sophisticated hatred, my Mona Lisa,…
Why couldn’t you just stay home, like I asked you to?
I'll fall to your feet, and wash them with my faked tears, you'll frown and entreat me, to a painful kick here, my heart in your hand, how fast did time pass? I am not a man, who believes in lies, more so I lie to you… I could've sworn, amidst all the wars, your long flowy hair, shaded black in despair, fulfilled the prophecy, of a woman too young to see, the ways of the world, from the viewpoint of a five year old.
Lisa, give me a hand, I'll keep you safe, if i were lying, we'd be amazed, the sinners church, is more extravagant than a prince's birth, and lying here, underneath the stars, i take your neck in my mouth, and compare our scars, with water filled lullabies, tearing us apart, no use for grammar or even simple need, all along, enthroned in alabaster, you were the queen.
Taken to poetry, the musical has been cancelled, the orchestra fired, the chandelier dismantled, an aura of kindle, a fire, a maze, in short simple terms, a contradictory gaze, astounded by diamonds, ambushed by coal, i stare, unabashedly, at your red ripped royal soul, kept in a jar, a jar filled with emotions, unused by all, all left unspoken.
Mona, i take your hand, is this your last request? Doomed to a life, filled with surgery and regret, chained to a wall, with a last hope to perfect, a blank diary, greets my visage, bandaged and broken, unknown to us all, i use this last resort, as a measure of trust, we walk the line, between roses and musk, there is no reason, i fall down this life, knowing very well what compromise would ensue, i crawl, blind towards the light...
Mona Lisa, take this last impressive bow, the tragedy of romantic comedy, gone forever, the vile summary is missing vitality, the facts have all been sugar-coated, advertising companies swoop in with powder, and sable coats.
So unsure of yourself, your hair flows into the lakebed, strutted down your last runaway line, gutted with gusto and disgust evident in your noble eyes, take back the fast pace, give her back her lovely old face, i couldn't protect you, my iconic grief coincides with the sayings of a wise one, the sun is burning me, alone in a dead sky, broken like your latest jewelry design, my mind reeling, i stumble, the storms winds' have pushed me into a better thinking position. There is no comfort believing in you, my little one, my toy you've grown up, you can't keep living in this coal mine, keep running till you fit the princess's stereotype, and then dig in the dirt, for your last ruby ring, do not go gently into that spark of last light, let the foolish side take over your reasonable mind, let practicality take over your dormant frugality, buy the sun, buy everything until you're broke from the inside out.
Lisa, you're pretty little head astounds me, even to this day...your sweetness makes my temperament look appalling, I resent you. Never grow up is what she told you, oh she lied, isn’t life so much sweeter when you know you’re about to die?
The telephone rings, and Leonardo ignores it so he can paint your brow, how lovely, it’s real. Unlike the others of your time, you have lines, lines, lines, everywhere, my line has disappeared, in this fast paced job, how can you overlook a weekend off? Too much, too much, I overdose on your private thoughts, the taste of your skin strikes a dull chord in me, awakening the memory of writing, sickened I lean forward, anticipating that metallic glint off of my tongue, whenever your blood meets mine,…oh, I wish we could do this all day, but night is approaching, and my social calendar is full, this voice I hear, this voice within, clouds my judgment, and I decide to spend the night.
Little known to me, your energy, envenomates me, and I look inside myself and trust your strength, emotionless you frown at my hesitation. Right and wrong has never been so difficult for you…you just frowned that beautiful smile, and people threw themselves at your feet, and you kicked them faraway…too afraid of connecting with them, holding onto the shreds of sanity that lead to the door of your self, no one else could compare to the madness, the deadliness made it so addicting, and here we are again, falling down this path of unmistaken misery, a journey that stabs us with confidence, and we’re learning now, how to trust yourself, and even if I have to kill you, you’ll understand, nothing else is a map, save your blood, begin to hate me, I resist your temptations, your charms…my self I’m a fool, a fool, dastardly thinking, it fooled me, me, me, oh I’m immune to your body, your voice, but those eyes alas those eyes.
Your frown makes it so much tastier, to devour you, oh enslaved I’m addicted, accomplished, sophisticated past the point of harder, better, faster, stronger, twice as amazingly powerless to your beating, deceiving, heart…your décolletage, so soft, it calls to me.
I must whisper all of my greatest everythings, all my naughty little somethings, all my tempted bastard lovings, possessed, enthralled, beaten to submission, poisonous, nothings, group together, form an army, and hate you, you, you, you, with all of our hearts…
Oh, Mona Lisa, every part of you & you & you, loosens my values till I’m insane enough to anticipate killing you,…
Oh my lovely, dangerous, complicated, oh so amazingly sophisticated hatred, my Mona Lisa,…
Why couldn’t you just stay home, like I asked you to?
No Surprise, , ,
I'm quite a mass of contradictions actually(: i love sounding smart, confusing people(:, hugging people, getting complimented, smiling, laughing, car-aoke, my talkativeness, being happy, explanations, being random, awkward silences, truth or dare?, bi-polar-ness, reading novels, reading yaoi, watching yaoi, crying, lesbianism, new shoes, gay-nism, fetishism, Ism's, realizations, jumping, falling(:, being spoiled, steaming from my ears(:, being held, arguing, spoiling someone, i am very open..., being impulsive, texting, making random food and cleaning(: but only at other people's houses haha(:, water, weeping, soft things, hot things, warm things, disease please?, spicy food, sweet food, bitter food, hot water, get out of my head..., alternating hot and cold weather xD, writing alot, soup, cues, my independence, classified information, power, gay people, Foreign stuff(:, exaggerating, watching people(:, fanfictions, yaoi, being bossy, then saying please xD, cashiers and baggers, racism, smiling, parking lots, typing, surprise, being indescribable..., wearing myself out, prejudice, being difficult, answering questions, tolerance, music, stuff off the top of my head, taste this wine, healing, random hugs, enthusiasm!!! licking, being histrionic, abstract thinking. writing a ton, corsetry, spanish soap operas, stay for awhile?, lines, on my knees...,the hate and the love i hold for myself, obsessing over something, the dark, change, drinking my tea in the shower, lying, scaring the crap out of my besties(:, video games, suicide, impromptu everything, denial, compromises..., smoking, romantic comedies, needing, pleasure.., daydreaming, words, talking, exhilaration, the double standards i hold everything to, looking at myself, complicated things, fake!?!swimming, taking quizzes, stars, cuddling, homophobia, deceiving, insecurity, "predictably unpredictable..." jealousy, simple things, afterthoughts, meanness, consequences, over-analyzing, spaces, rules, imagining, freedoms, will, impromptu picnics, blame :/, revising&editing, antiques, favorite flavor, hatred, cyanide, contemplating, ignorance, being scared, watching movies, I am a very proud SanJuanita, names, pain, bargain shopping, blood..., splurging, thinking, being sheltered, misunderstanding, arguing(:, spazzing out, lying, crying and telling the truth, second-guessing myself, desire, suffering, bragging, a hole in my sleeve, admitting i was wrong, winning, falling, losing, texting you @ 4 in the morning :D<3, disturbing daydreams, depression (it sucks...), anime, exasperation!, manga, dares, ranting, distractions, breaking things, changing/teasing myself, talking to myself, arguing with myself, sometimes losing(:....lol feeling peaceful, keeping my mind open, camping, thinking outside the cube(: being crazy and hyper, redemption?, getting mad, acting, rocking out, slow dancing and tripping, picking myself apart, overdosing, sadomasochism, being clumsy, (badly) singing in the shower, writing, the bitter taste of angels, getting the right answer!, confessions, getting the wrong answer!, my scars, la~la~la~la, screaming in frustration, shame, rotflmao, psychiatry, 69-Yin and Yang you perverts!!! haha lording over my superior sense of conversation...okay i lied(: haha and most of all...Skin(:
Love,
San Juanita E. Hernandez(:
Love,
San Juanita E. Hernandez(:
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